Wanting

Overview

Wanting: The Power of Mimetic Desire in Everyday Life by Luke Burgis draws on the work of French philosopher René Girard to explore how we unconsciously imitate what others want, leading to conflict, unfulfillment, and poor decisions. Named a Financial Times Business Book of the Month.

About the Author

Luke Burgis is an entrepreneur, teacher, and director of programs at the Ciocca Center for Principled Entrepreneurship at the Catholic University of America. He has founded and led multiple companies and teaches classical philosophy and theology.

Core Concept: Mimetic Desire

We learn to want what other people want.

Desire is not intrinsic—it's mimetic (imitated). We model our desires on others, often unconsciously, leading us to want things not because we truly value them, but because others do.

Key Principles

Three Elements of Mimetic Desire

1. Subject: The person who desires
2. Model: The person we imitate
3. Object: What is desired

We think we desire objects directly. In reality, we desire them because a model desires them.

Two Types of Models

Celebratory Models (external mediators):

• People far removed from our context
• No direct competition possible
• Safe to admire and emulate
• Example: historical figures, celebrities

Rivalrous Models (internal mediators):

• People in our same sphere
• Direct competition is possible
• Can become rivals
• Example: colleagues, peers, friends

Mimetic Cycles

Positive Cycles

• Models who inspire authentic growth
• Desires aligned with true values
• Healthy competition and motivation
• Expansive, generative relationships

Negative Cycles

• Rivalry and conflict
• Pursuing others' goals, not your own
• Escalating competition
• Resentment and comparison

Applications to Startups

Entrepreneurial Mimesis

Founders often:

• Copy what successful founders want
• Chase the same opportunities as peers
• Pursue prestige over purpose
• Compete in crowded spaces

This leads to:

• Copycat companies
• Intense zero-sum competition
• Building what's hot, not what's needed
• Unfulfilling success

The Venture Capital Cycle

Mimetic desire drives:

• Investors funding similar companies
• "Hot" sectors getting overcrowded
• Founders chasing same metrics
• Bubble formation and crashes

Building Unique Companies

To escape mimetic competition:

• Cultivate independent thinking
• Find thick desires (deeply rooted)
• Question why you want what you want
• Choose celebratory over rivalrous models

Thick vs. Thin Desires

Thin Desires

• Shallow, imitative
• Driven by external validation
• Easily abandoned
• Leave you unfulfilled
• Examples: status symbols, trends

Thick Desires

• Deep, intrinsic
• Aligned with your values
• Resilient and lasting
• Genuinely fulfilling
• Examples: mastery, service, meaning

Mimetic Rivalry

How Rivalry Emerges

1. We model our desires on someone
2. We pursue the same object
3. We become obstacles to each other
4. The obstacle makes the object more desirable
5. The object becomes secondary to beating the rival

Escaping Rivalry

• Recognize mimetic dynamics
• Choose different games
• Redefine success metrics
• Cultivate abundance mindset
• Find blue oceans

The Freshman Fifteen

Burgis shares a college experiment where he offered extra credit for completing 15 tasks. Despite having unlimited budget, most students chose the same 3-4 tasks. Why? They copied each other's desires, assuming the most popular tasks were most valuable.

Lesson: We miss opportunities by imitating others instead of thinking independently.

Social Media Amplification

Social media supercharges mimetic desire:

• Constant exposure to others' lives
• Manufactured desire through influence
• Comparison on steroids
• Algorithm-driven rivalry
• Decreased originality

Finding Authentic Desires

Questions to Ask

• Why do I want this?
• Who am I imitating?
• Would I want this if nobody knew?
• What would I do if I couldn't tell anyone?
• Is this a thick or thin desire?

Practices

• Spend time in silence and solitude
• Reduce social media consumption
• Choose celebratory models carefully
• Cultivate self-awareness
• Question assumptions about success

Anti-Mimetic Tactics

For Founders

1. Choose Different Spaces: Don't compete where everyone else is
2. Define Success Differently: Create your own scorecard
3. Pursue Unfashionable Ideas: What's overlooked might be valuable
4. Build for Specific People: Not general markets
5. Cultivate Originality: Through diverse inputs and reflection

For Individuals

1. Curate Your Models: Who you follow shapes what you want
2. Practice Negative Capability: Comfort with not knowing
3. Develop Thick Desires: Through introspection and values work
4. Create Space: Distance from mimetic pressure
5. Seek Truth Over Agreement: Independent thinking

Connection to Business Strategy

Relates to:

• Peter Thiel's "Zero to One": Avoiding competition through uniqueness
• Blue Ocean Strategy: Creating uncontested market space
• The Innovator's Dilemma: Why companies imitate instead of innovate

Why It Matters for Founders

Understanding mimetic desire helps:

• Build truly unique companies
• Avoid crowded, competitive markets
• Make authentic decisions
• Hire people with intrinsic motivation
• Create original products
• Resist trend-chasing
• Find fulfillment in work

The Girardian Insight

René Girard observed:

• Desire is triangular (subject-model-object)
• Conflict arises from sameness, not difference
• Scapegoating results from mimetic crisis
• Human culture is built on mimetic dynamics

Burgis makes these insights accessible and applicable.

Recommended For

• Founders feeling unfulfilled despite success
• Anyone caught in competitive spirals
• People questioning their goals
• Leaders building company culture
• Investors understanding market dynamics

Recognition

• Financial Times Business Book of the Month
• Bloomberg "52 New Books Top Business Leaders Are Recommending"
• Widely discussed in Silicon Valley and intellectual circles

Available in hardcover, paperback, ebook, and audiobook formats at standard retail prices.